You're A Bridesmaid - So Start Acting Like One!

We know. Being a bridesmaid isn't always easy. It can be expensive and you may have a to wear a dress that you don't love, but now is not the time to complain. 

You should always remind yourself that being a bridesmaid or part of the bridal party is a honor. It's another way of telling you how special you are to this bride-to-be and she couldn't imagine having her big day without you by her side. That's one of the nicest gestures you'll ever get! So appreciate it. 

Now before we go on forgetting this reminder, please keep the following in mind. Print it out if you need to! 

Our Suggestions for Bridesmaid Etiquette 

Do note that these are only suggestions, but we've found that this will not only make the bride's time enjoyable but also your own. 

1. No complaining
   Please don't complain to the bride. You realize she's planning the biggest day of her life, right? Normally a good friend will listen to you complain and help you out, but this time is different. This is her big day and not yours. Give your input, but don't feel bad if the bride doesn't go with your suggestions. She has a certain vision for her day, so don't ruin it! Everyone is entitled to making their wedding day as they've been imagining it. If it's wearing an ungly dress than wear it with a smile! Complaining is different than compromising. Having financial problems is a different story. If you need to vent and complain, you can but just don't do it with anyone else in the wedding party or to the bride. Sometimes it's best to keep things to yourself.
   
   Also, just because the wedding is over doesn't mean you are now free to complain and comment on things you didn't like about the wedding. Remember, it wasn't your day. If you keep complaining, it's eventually going to get back to the bride. 
    
2. Don't be selfish 
   
   ˈselfiSH 

   adjective

   (of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.
   
   Don't be this person! Yes, you are part of the wedding, but this isn't your day. You are there for support and keeping things from getting stressful. If you are acting selfish than you are just adding to the stress. Understand that you will have a very different perspective than anyone else in the bridal party. It's important to give your input and be part of the planning with bridal activities, but don't plan things that the bride-to-be would love. 
   
   
3. Don't be tanner than the bride
   No, we aren't kidding. Well kind of. People usually say don't be prettier than the bride. We say just don't be tanner. Pictures are very important to some bride, and the last thing she wants is to look pale next to her best friends and family members. We TOTALLY understand that having a nice tan is also very important to you and sometimes uncontrollable. All we are asking for is for you to maybe use a higher SPF or go for a lighter shade with your spray tan. 
   
   
4. Remember that weddings are expensive
   Obviously, but sometimes we need to be reminded of this. If we haven't been in a wedding ourselves, we forget how much the bride is spending on her big day. We might stress about how expensive the bridesmaid dress is, that we have to pay for our own makeup, that there are travel costs associated with the bachelorette party, but the bride-to-be is spending outrageous costs for her wedding day. 
   
   Now we all have different financial situations, so it's understandable that you can't afford everything, but you need to approach it in the right way if there are things you have to back out of. Most people will understand, but the bride might find it hard to relate when she's spending much more than you overall. Don't feel frustrated just respect her perspective. 
   
   
5. Keep calm and carry on  
   This is a recommendation for you and the bride. Remember to relax and enjoy this time. It should also be special for you. Make the most out of it and just keep calm. If the bride gets snappy with you on the wedding day, just keep smiling. Weddings don't always bring out the best in people, so just try to enjoy yourself and help when you can. 

If you only remember one thing, it's to not make it about you. Your day may come one day, and your friends will remember how excited, helpful, and caring you were about their own special day.  

photo credit: numberstumper via photopin cc & acrib via photopin cc